Fear

I'm battling obsessing over the bar. A fellow law grad (passed NY Bar a few yrs ago) told me that the damage is done- I can do n/a. Except worry.

What's worse: not knowing or knowing I failed? I'm gonna go with knowing I failed at this point.

For me to deal w failing that test, I need to reassure myself [again] that it will not be the end of the world:

1. The world will continue; therefore, it will not end.

2. I'd be broke until April anyway- when my job is [supposed to] start.

3. Firms give you a 2nd chance.

4. My dogs will still be alive.

5. My failing won't kill anyone I love.

6. I can take it again, pass, & never look back.

7. The second time around, I won't be as burned out as I was the first time. In fact, I already feel prepared to go for round 2.

8. I can take 2 bars in Feb.

9. So in the end, 1 failure may result in my passing 3 bars. (as opposed to 1, bc if I pass, I prob won't take another bar for awhile).

10. I have ample time to study before the next bar. And I would * definitely * pass the 2nd time around. There's no question that I have the ability/intelligence.

11. Hillary Clinton failed the DC bar.

Ok, I feel better. I feel more prepared to fail. Not that I wouldn't cry my eyes out, but I will survive. I will probably have to revisit this list 45 times before next Thursday. But that's okay.

Stress is so peculiar. Normally, I don't mind my beagle's loud growls/moans/barks. But when I think of the bar & she is making noise, I want to kill her. I get an immediate migraine. My eyes hurt.