Lists

This morning on my drive to work I simultaneously listened to the White Stripes and wallowed in a pool of my own self-pity. I have nothing to look forward to today. I have class until 7:45PM. In the meantime, I have to sit through a 1.15 hr class on taking Depositions, read for Bankruptcy (BO-RING!), read for tomorrow's Administrative Law class (equal parts boring & complicated) AND/OR write a paper on the First Amendment freedom of speech clause. While in theory this last task *could* constitute studying some relatively interesting material and issues..................................it doesn't. The pressure of writing these 8 pages in a manner that scores an "A" for me outweighs any personal interest I may possess on the topic of free speech. Bummer, right?

I had more fun going to the doctor yesterday and finding out that the bump is not in fact a pimple & is a swollen lymph node. The realization that I have been obsessively pushing (really hard) on a swollen lymph node sends waves of nausea through my body. I'm on antibiotics. I learned that you CAN drink while you're on antibiotics. This made me feel better because the anticipation of enjoying my evening bloody mary with J & the doggies is what gets me through the day.... I suppose this is why attorneys are alcoholics. Because their days suck so much. (Although, admittedly, while I was working the past 2 summers in law related jobs, I liked the work, the people & the money I received. So I suppose I have an aversion merely to law school. This comforts me).

Now that I'm through venting, I thought of some jobs that are superior to going to law school:

1. Bus Driver. All you have to do is not show up drunk. Who cares if the kids yell? They're on the bus for like 45 minutes. No biggie.

2. Hair dresser at a low-end salon. Nobody likes to deal w "Type A's" who are willing to spend $100s on their hair-- I don't even like dealing with in real life in non-job related actvities. I'll take a job at Cost-Cutters, make friends with my fellow stylists, cut some hair for $7/hair cut, have a few laughs, call it a day.

3. Waitress. I've always loved waitressing. Despite the fact that there's always some b*tch complaining about the temperature of her soup, you secretly don't care if she EVER comes back to the restaurant and therefore, you don't sweat her anger. In fact, you prefer that she NEVER return. This reminds me of the woman who ordered a pizza at the place I was working a few summers ago. She wanted a pizza with bacon. I delivered to her a pizza with pepperoni, without thinking. I suppose it had been a long day for me. WOOO-WEE, was she pissed. How silly! It's a PIZZA. To this day, I bet the dummy stews over that waitress who had the AUDACITY to deliver her a PIZZA with PEPPERONI as opposed to the BACON that she ordered. She ended up getting a free pizza. Even her 2 daughters were embarassed and needlessly overtipped me to compensate for their mother's obnoxious behavior.

A few jobs that are NOT better than law school:

1. Working at my old job for the Pegg-meister. Because at least I'm not verbally & emotionally abused in law school. I'm just bored.... which is precisely the way I felt sitting at that d*mn desk all day *pretending* to be busy so that she wouldn't harass me for just sitting around (which is... precisely what a secretary is paid to do, is it not?) Not according to Peggs, folks, not according to Peggs. I had to EARN that $18K/yr.

2. Sometimes I think being a bartender would suck because of the off-hours. But bartenders seem to enjoy themselves, so I'm hesitant to include this occupation on this portion of the list.

3. Being a Dell computer service person (usually in India). Despite the fact that the caller on the other end of the line is located in a warmer climate, I feel like dealing with people like me all day who have viruses on their computers from pirating music illegaly would not be fun. Mainly because you cannot fix their problem and they're already cranky. I bet the desire to hang up on them is intense.

4. OB/GYN.

5. Dental assistant.